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Is it me or is that scene totally hot?

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LAFF A DAY                             Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Greetings Laff Lovers,

One of my favorite older movies was on cable last night, 
Big Trouble in Little China. Is it me or is that scene where 
Kim Cattrall is dressed up like a Chinese whore totally hot? 

I wonder if I could get my wife to dress up like that for me. 
Probably not, in which case I'd have to find an actual Chinese 
whore to fulfill that fantasy. And then I'd probably get the 
Mongolian Crotch Rot or something, and that's never fun. 



"There's a new interview out with Jessica Alba. She explains 
why her baby girl is named Honor. A lot of celebrities name 
their baby after where the baby was conceived. Honor is 
named Honor because Jessica was 'on her' back when she was 
conceived." -Craig Ferguson

2-pk Limelight Flush Night Lights...

Normal Price: $4.99
DEAL PRICE: $2.99 
Get two (4 lights) for $4.98

These night lights provide a great way to ensure energy safety 
throughout your entire home. You've seen the same ones sold in 
Ace Hardware for as much as $4.99 each. Now you can get them 
for $2.99 or get two sets (4 lights) for $4.98... less than the 
normal pack of just one.

Each diminutive (2" x 2" x 3/8") light emits a soft glow that 
lets you know where a wall or door may be when you most need to 
know. Ever stub your toe in a wall? No annoying light bulb to 
replace. Remember Get One For $2.99 or Two For $4.98, visit: 

2-pk Limelight Flush Night Lights...

A little old lady is walking down the street dragging two 
plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a 
hole in one of the bags and every once in a while a $20 bill 
comes flying out of it onto the pavement. Noticing this, a 
policeman stops her. 

"Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag." 

"Damn!" says the little old lady, "I'd better go back and see 
if I can gather up some of them. Thanks!" 

"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "Where did you get 
that money? Did you steal it?" 

"Oh, no," says the little old lady. "You see, my yard backs 
up to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time 
there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes 
right into my flower beds! So, I stand behind the bushes 
with a big hedge clipper and each time some guy sticks his 
dick through the bushes, I say; '$20 or off it comes!'" 

"Hey not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "Ok, good luck! By 
the way, what's in the other bag?" 

"Well," says the little old lady, "not all of them pay up." 

"I had to go to analysis. They told me I had an unresolved 
Oedipus complex. Which, according to them, meant I want to 
sleep with my mother. Which is preposterous. My father 
doesn't even want to sleep with my mother." 
 --Dennis Wolfberg 

Carol Burnett's Gone With The Wind Spoof...

You're in for a REAL treat today. If you want to take a 
couple of minutes, I guarantee you'll have a smile on 
your face. Do you remember the Carol Burnett spoof of 
Gone With The Wind called Went With The Wind? 

If you do, then you know how hilarious it is and you laugh 
all over again... if you've never seen it then get ready to 
laugh, laugh, and laugh some more. 

The clip you'll see is from hands down one of the funniest 
(and most complete) DVD comedy collections ever put together.
What we've done, aside from getting a special discount, is 
taken one of the funniest moments in TV ever and put it on 
the site for you to watch. 

To watch the video on Carol Burnett or order the DVD Collection 
(10 hours of hilarious footage) visit: 

Carol Burnett's Spoof of Gone With The Wind

A monk who's been sheltered all of his life has to travel to 
the big city to meet his friend, a Catholic nun. 

On the streets of the city, he encounters a prostitute who 
says: "Blowjob? Five dollars?" 

"No, thank you!" the monk says, blushing. 

He moves on to the next street corner and another hooker 
asks him, "Blowjob? Five dollars?" 

He hurriedly rushes down the streets but on each corner 
there's a woman asking if he wants a blowjob. By the time 
he reaches the convent, he's very upset. 

He asks his friend the nun, "Sister, what's a "blowjob?" 

She says, "Five dollars." 

P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the 
new Laffaday forum. Check it out here... Laffaday Forum


           *** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***

  It's Available. The Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's
  F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
  Laffaday Book


To see more issues like this visit: Laff A Day Archives
Visit the Laff A Day Website here: http://www.laffaday.com
More FUN and AMUSEMENT sent by email: www.gophercentral.com


Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved. 

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