Home | Newest Editions | Most Popular Issues | Free Newsletters | Forums

Custom Search
Publication: Laff A Day
An unhealthy fantasy life.

Subscribe FREE to Laff A Day by clicking here.



LAFF A DAY - Wednesday, July 2, 2008
*************************************************************

Greetings Laff Lovers,

The wife and I were watching some sword and sorcery movie 
in bed the other night (actually, I was watching it and 
she was reading a book). It was Conan, as I recall, and a 
couple of the scenes sparked some ideas in my mind. 

"Honey," I said, nudging my wife, "the kids are going to 
stay with your mother for a weekend next month, aren't 
they?" 

"Mmmm hmmm."

"I have an idea...since we'll have the house to ourselves 
why don't we get you a slave girl outfit, I'll see if I can 
find a loincloth and maybe a sword from somewhere, then we 
can pretend the living room is your village, I'll invade, 
do a little pillaging and then I'll rape you!" 

"Or..." she countered, "you could get yourself a lawyer and 
then I'll rape you in court."

"Can I still wear the loincloth?"

Deniedly, 

TZ


Women complain about sex more than men. Their gripes fall 
into two major categories:

(1) Not enough.
(2) Too much.



THROW THAT OLD BULKY AND SCRATCHED CHOPPING BOARD AWAY...
IT'S TIME FOR THE SPACE AGE FLEXIBLE CHOPPING MAT

Developed by scientists and used only by the finest chefs of 
the world... You too can make the revolutionary Flexible 
Chopping Mat a part of YOUR kitchen. 

Perfect for cutting and chopping, the futuristic surface won't 
dull knives. Not only will it protect your countertops it also 
provides a sanitary work surface. Great for camping, boating, 
picnics and RV's. You can even fold the sides and it becomes a 
funnel... great for your veggies. Oh yeah, did we mention its 
dishwasher safe and FDA approved. Don't wait get three (3) 
Flexible Chopping Mats for JUST $2.99 when you visit below: 

Flexible Chopping Mats



According to a new survey about sex, 51 percent of people 
said they would consider having sex for money if the amount 
offered was large enough. 

The average woman said the amount would have to be at least 
$35,000. 

The average man, on the other hand, said, "How much change 
do you have on you?"



Reasons To Like Beer by 7 Year Olds 

A handful of 7 year old children were asked, 'what they 
thought of beer.' Some interesting responses, but the last 
one is especially touching. 


7-year-old Tim- 'I think beer must be good. My dad says the 
more beer he drinks the prettier my mom gets.'

7-year-old Melanie - 'Beer makes my dad sleepy and we get 
to watch what we want On television when he is asleep, so 
beer is nice. 

7-year-old Grady - 'My Mom and Dad both like beer. My Mom 
gets funny when she drinks it and takes her top off at 
parties, but Dad doesn't think this is very funny.'

7-year-old Toby - 'My Mom and Dad talk funny when they drink 
beer and The more they drink the more they give kisses to 
each other, which is a good thing.' 



     Chugga-chugga Chugga-chugga CHOOOO CHOOOOO!
ALL ABOARD for the Great Trans-American Train Ride On DVD

Join travel expert Doug Jones on an unforgettable adventure
as he guides you on a spectacular coast-to-coast journey on 
3 of America's greatest trains! The Great Trans-American 
Train Ride will carry you from "Sea to Shining Sea" on a 
romantic and nostalgic cross-sountry journey aboard the last 
great passenger trains of the U.S.A.. On DVD for $16.99. 

The Great American Train Ride



7-year-old Sarah - 'My Dad gets funny on beer. He is funny. 
He also wets his pants sometimes, so he shouldn't have too 
much. 

7-year-old Lilly - 'My Dad loves beer. The more he drinks, 
the better he dances. One time he danced right into the pool.' 

7-year-old Ethan - 'I don't like beer very much. Every time 
Dad drinks it, he burns the sausages on the barbecue and they 
taste disgusting.' 

7-year-old Shirley - 'I give Dad's beer to the dog and he 
goes to sleep.' 

7-year-old Jack - 'My Mom drinks beer and she says silly 
things and picks on my father.  Whenever she drinks beer 
she yells at Dad and tells him to go bury his bone down the 
street again, but that doesn't make any sense.'


P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the 
new Laffaday forum. Check it out here... Laffaday Forum


------------------------------------------------------------

           *** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***

  It's Available. The Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's
  F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
  
  Laffaday Book

------------------------------------------------------------

To see more issues like this visit: Laff A Day Archives
Visit the Laff A Day Website here: http://www.laffaday.com
More FUN and AMUSEMENT sent by email: www.gophercentral.com

____________________________________________________________

END OF LAFF A DAY
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved. 

E-Mail this issue
Subscribe FREE to Laff A Day by clicking here.

The Laff A Day Forum
newsletter delivery
where are my newsletters?
BRING BACK CHADWICK!!!!!!!
View this Forum | Post a topic to this forum






SNL - Sweaty Balls

Watch It Now

Deuce Bigalow - Deuce Window Dance (Deleted Scene)

Watch It Now

MadTV - Fear Factor

Watch It Now

Pulp Fiction - Gourmet Coffee

Watch It Now

Home | Newest Editions | Most Popular Issues | Free Newsletters