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Publication: Laff A Day
Do not break the chain.

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LAFF A DAY - Friday, May 30, 2008
*************************************************************

Greetings Laff Lovers,

I received this in the mail today. I'm still getting use out 
of my wife, but far be it from me to keep another man from 
finding happiness. 


   This chain letter was started in hopes of 
   bringing relief to other tired and discouraged 
   men. Unlike most chain letters, this one does 
   not cost anything. Just send a copy of this 
   letter to five of your friends who are equally 
   tired and discontented. Then bundle up your 
   wife or girlfriend, send her to the man whose 
   name appears at the top of the list, and add 
   your name to the bottom of the list. 

   When your turn comes, you will receive 15,625 
   women. One of them is bound to be better than 
   the one you already have.

   At the writing of this letter, a friend of mine 
   had already received 184 women, of whom 4 were 
   worth keeping.

   REMEMBER this chain brings luck. One man's pit 
   bull died, and the next day he received a Play-
   boy model. 

   An unmarried man living with his widowed mother 
   was able to choose between a Hooters waitress 
   and a Hollywood supermodel.

   You can be lucky too, but DO NOT BREAK THE 
   CHAIN! One man broke the chain, and got his own 
   wife back again.

Superstitiously, 

TZ


On a train from London to Manchester, an American tourist 
was berating the Englishman sitting across from him in the 
compartment.

"You English are too stuffy. You set yourselves apart too 
much. You think your stiff upper lips make your above the 
rest of us. Look at me ... I'm me, I have Italian blood, 
French blood, a little Indian blood and some Swedish blood. 
What do you say to that?"

The Englishman replied, "Very sporting of your mother."



Your Child Is Missing...

These are four words you NEVER want to hear. If you should 
ever have to file a missing report, it is IMPORTANT for you 
to document and store vital information about your child to 
help police act fast.

The Child ID Kit allows you to log everything from your 
child's physical appearance and medical history, to their 
fingerprints, dental records, DNA hair sample, and even 
store a recent photo of your child. Here's what you get:

* Personal & Medical Information
* Physical Characteristics Sheet
* Photograph Sheet
* Safe Shoes ID
* Fingerprinting inkpad and finger chart
* Dental Chart

There is nothing more important than your child's safety. Get 
your Child ID Kit TODAY for just $1.49 plus s&h... Visit: 

CHILD ID KIT



Hellen Keller went to town, 
riding on a pony. 
Stuck a feather in her cap, 
and called it BLEEEEEEAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHGHGHAG. 



"A new survey shows that the more female you are physically, 
the harder it is to be taken seriously in business. For 
example, women with very large breasts have a harder time 
being promoted than women with penises." 



SET OF TWO 5" FLAMELESS ON/OFF PILLAR CANDLES

Normal Price: $19.99 each
DEAL PRICE: $14.99 for a Set of Two Candles

It looks like a regular candle, it flickers like a regular 
candle, but it is so much easier and safer! 

No heat, no melted wax to clean up. This is perfect for use 
outside because the "flame" won't blow out, and perfect for 
inside events because there is no danger or mess. Use it 
alone or in your favorite holder or sconce. The light 
flickers exactly like a wick flame. 5" tall, 3" diameter. 
A neat idea for your kid's or teen's room where you might 
not want an open flame. Take it with you on your travels to 
make hotel rooms feel like home. 

This battery operated LED flickering pillar candle can be 
used anywhere you would use a regular pillar candle, and 
many places you wouldn't. To see a picture or order visit: 

SET OF TWO 5" FLAMELESS ON/OFF PILLAR CANDLES



It was three o'clock in the morning, and the receptionist 
at a posh hotel was just dozing off, when a little old 
lady came running towards her, screaming. "Please come 
quickly!" she yelled, "I just saw a naked man outside my 
window!"

The receptionist immediately rushed up to the old lady's 
room. "Where is he?" she asked.

"He's over there," replied the little old lady, pointing 
to an apartment building opposite the hotel.

The receptionist looked over and could see a man with no 
shirt on, moving around his apartment. 

"It's probably a man who's getting ready to go to bed," 
she said reassuringly. "And how do you know he's naked, 
you can only see him from the waist up?"

"The dresser!" screamed the old lady. "Try standing on the 
dresser!"


P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the 
new Laffaday forum. Check it out here... Laffaday Forum


------------------------------------------------------------

           *** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***

  It's Available. The Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's
  F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
  
  Laffaday Book

------------------------------------------------------------

To see more issues like this visit: Laff A Day Archives
Visit the Laff A Day Website here: http://www.laffaday.com
More FUN and AMUSEMENT sent by email: www.gophercentral.com

____________________________________________________________

END OF LAFF A DAY
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved. 

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