Home | Newest Editions | Most Popular Issues | Free Newsletters | Forums

Custom Search
Publication: Laff A Day
I'm au naturelle.

Subscribe FREE to Laff A Day by clicking here.



LAFF A DAY - Friday, July 11, 2008
*************************************************************


Dear Diary, Here's how my love and I communicate...

"Your getting old," my wife said as she ran her hands through 
my graying hair. "I loved the way your temples were gray and 
the rest was still black, but now..."

"Gray hair is a mark of wisdom," I countered. "Remember how 
Charlton Heston went up the mountain with black har and came 
down all gray and wise? I'm like that."

"You are wise and strong..."

OK, OK, that's not exactly how the conversation went. It 
actually went like this.

Wife: "You look old. How about if I dye your hair?"

Me: "What, and make me look like my uncle with blue/black 
hair? No thanks. I'm au naturelle."

Wife: "TZ, your erections are already a bit soggy, your hair 
is going gray and next your ass is going to drop. I might 
just have me a fling with a stud who doesn't have those 
issues."

Me: "I'm gray because of you and your damned kids, my 
erections are soggy because of you, and if my ass drops it's 
going to be on your cousin Patty's face. But I'll tell you 
what: I'll use that Touch of Gray stuff we're peddling at 
the office because it's easy and doesn't have a mix or a 
mess. Some swipes with the comb and I'm done--under one 
condition: you toss my salad."

Wife: "Is that the one where your ass gets licked?"

Me: "Yeah."

Wife: "Sorry, Charlie. The only ass I'm ever going to lick 
is the guy I'm with after you. And I'll only do it to him 
to spite you."

Me: "But how will I know?"

Wife: "It'll be one of your friends' ass that I'm licking." 

Me: "OK. I'll tell them they have a shot."

Meanwhile, click this link to get your rebate for a free
Touch of Gray product. You just can't beat an opportunity 
to try the easiest, most natural looking treatment 
available for free.

Visit: Get Rid of Your Gray for Free

Youthfully,

TZ


"In a new interview, 17-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears talks 
about her new baby and that she can't wait to be a soccer 
mom. Actually Jamie Lynn is already a soccer mom because 
she's the only mom on her high school's soccer team." 
 -Conan O'Brien



BLOOPERS DVD 2-Pk
News Bloopers & Presidential Bloopers

Retail Price: $19.99
DEAL PRICE: $3.99

Get two (2) hilarious DVDs, together for the first time, at 
a closeout price of just $3.99. 

Get ready to laugh, laugh and then laugh some more as you 
watch these usually straight-laced and stately figures at 
there not-so-great-moments. Admit it, it's fun to watch 
people making funny mistakes. 

Remember you get two DVDs: 
      * News Bloopers       * Presidential Bloopers

Don't miss this specially priced collection. Once we sell 
out, they'll be gone forever. To see a funny video from the
DVD collection or to order, visit: BLOOPERS DVD 2-Pk



A man is driving his five year old to a friend's house when 
another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing 
an accident. 

"Douche-bag!" the father yells. 

A moment later he realizes the indiscretion, pulls over, and 
turns to face his son. "Your father just said a bad word," 
he says. "I was angry at that driver, but that was no excuse 
for what I said. It was wrong. But just because I said it, 
it doesn't make it right, and I don't ever want to hear you 
saying it. Is that clear?" 

His son looks at him and says, "Too late, douche-bag." 



"Jesse also said he thought Barack Obama was talking down 
to black people by lecturing them on things like father-
hood and being a responsible husband. Jesse thought it 
was insulting not only to him, but to his former mistress 
and their love child." -Jay Leno



BRIEFCASE/LAPTOP BAG

Normal Price: $19.99
DEAL PRICE: $5.99

Plain and simple this is one heck of a deal. Discounted 
below cost, you'll want to pick up a couple. Makes a
great gift. Check it out by visiting: 

Briefcase/Laptop Bag



One of our female members, who shall remain nameless, took 
a vacation to France some years ago with one of her girl-
friends.

Her husband drove her to the airport and wished her a good 
trip. The wife asked, "Would you like me to bring something 
back for you?"

The husband laughed and says, "How about a French girl!"

Our lady kept quiet, didn't respond and went into the 
terminal. 

Two weeks later her husband picked her up at the airport and 
asked, "So, honey, how was the trip?"

"Really great, I loved Paris."

"And, what happened to my present?"

"Which present?"

"What I asked for....the French girl?"

"Oh, that? Well, I did what I could, now we'll have to wait 
nine months to see if it's a girl."


P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the 
new Laffaday forum. Check it out here... Laffaday Forum


------------------------------------------------------------

           *** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***

  It's Available. The Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's
  F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
  
  Laffaday Book

------------------------------------------------------------

To see more issues like this visit: Laff A Day Archives
Visit the Laff A Day Website here: http://www.laffaday.com
More FUN and AMUSEMENT sent by email: www.gophercentral.com

____________________________________________________________

END OF LAFF A DAY
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved. 

E-Mail this issue
Subscribe FREE to Laff A Day by clicking here.

The Laff A Day Forum
newsletter delivery
where are my newsletters?
BRING BACK CHADWICK!!!!!!!
View this Forum | Post a topic to this forum






SNL - Sweaty Balls

Watch It Now

Deuce Bigalow - Deuce Window Dance (Deleted Scene)

Watch It Now

MadTV - Fear Factor

Watch It Now

Pulp Fiction - Gourmet Coffee

Watch It Now

Home | Newest Editions | Most Popular Issues | Free Newsletters