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What\'s with the rain?

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             GOPHER BITS - Friday, July 21, 2006
 Over 4,000,000 readers subscribe to our F-R-E-E newsletters 
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Comment The Post Below...


We were practically in a drought last year...actually, we 
were in a drought last year here in Illinois. But this year 
it seems like it has been raining a couple days out of 
every week! I thought for sure we would have made up for 
last year's shortfall, but I just read a report that large 
portions of Illinois where all the corn and wheat is grown 
have experienced almost an inch below normal rainfall. 

What the heck!? My backyard looks like a tropical jungle and 
a hundred miles south of me the poor farmers are watching 
thousands of acres of crops drying up in 90 plus weather. 

I would rather not have to cut my grass twice a week and let 
them struggle with huge harvests. 

By the way...only one person out of the entire list emailed 
me with the answer to what book last week's riddle came from. 
It was, of course, 'The Hobbit' by J.R.R. Tolkien. The book 
that comes right before the Lord of the Rings trilogy. And 
I'm sure you're all familiar with that!



P.S. If you're interested we now have a blog. You can post 
comments on this and recent issues at... Gopher Bits Blog


     ?                                                ?
     ? Guess This Week's BRAIN TEASER and MOVIE QUOTE ?
     ?                                                ?


We fit inside every book or two, 
No telling what we do. 

We may change lives forever, 
We are clever, 

Or maybe just weak wit, 
We even make up the ingredients to a banana split! 

What are we?

MOVIE QUOTE: "As Wichita falls... so falls Wichita Falls." 

              *** Answers at the bottom! *** 

**  For more Teasers and Movie Quotes, click below for a  **
                    F-R-E-E SUBSCRIPTION!

The Daily Tease
Subscribe to The Daily Tease

Squirrely's Film Quotes and TV Trivia

Subscribe to Film Quotes 

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******************** CELEBRITY NOOZ ********************

Pam & Kid Rock to Marry...

Will they or won't they? That seems to be the question after 
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Website. "Yes. I'm finally getting remarried...it's been a 
whirlwind... spontaneous but well thought through," she wrote.

Subscribe to Celebrity Nooz

************** BIZARRE STORY OF THE WEEK *************** 

-------- Police Stand-Off Goes Off Without A Bang ----------

PORT ANGELES - It had all the makings of a successful police 
standoff - four officers and a sheriff's deputy armed with 
an assault rifle, a police bullhorn siren, and even a "throw 
phone" commonly used in crisis negotiations. There was just 
one problem - the person they were trying to contact wasn't 
in the house. Port Angeles police had a five-hour standoff 
with a reportedly suicidal woman with a knife before they 
learned that the house was empty. Police closed off the 
street in front of the house and tried to contact her by 
phone, then by using a throw phone, and finally a bullhorn 
siren. A robot device that was brought to the scene couldn't 
find the woman inside. The house was empty the whole time, 
said Port Angeles Police Cpl. Kevin Miller.

Subscribe to Bizarre News


PRINCETON, NJ - A clinical study at UCLA confirms that a
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******************** WEEKLY JOKES ********************* 


The Pharaoh was dictating, and his scribe was busily 
chipping away at the stone tablet. "I have plans . . . to 
form," the monarch said slowly, "a personal bodyguard . . . 
of stalwart . . .and virile . . . young men." 

The chips flew, but then suddenly ceased flying, and the 
perspiring chiseler looked up inquiringly, "Excuse me, your 
Majesty, but is virile spelled with one or two testicles?"

      (WARNING! Contains adult humor and language) 

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A grandmother was pushing her little grandchild around Wal-
Mart in a buggy. Each time she put something in the basket 
she would say, "And here's something for you, Diploma." or 
"This will make a cute little outfit for you, Diploma." and 
so on. 

Eventually a bewildered shopper who'd heard all this finally 
asked, "Why do you keep calling your grandchild Diploma?" 

The grandmother replied, "I sent my daughter to Virginia Tech 
and this is what she came home with!"

Subscribe to CLEAN LAFFS 


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****************** WEEKL VIDEO CLIP *******************

13 Going On 30: Razzles 

13 Going on 30 was released in 2004 and directed by Gary 
Winick. In this clip, Jenna (Jennifer Garner) and Matt 
(Mark Ruffalo) take a stroll and Jenna tells Matt a secret.

View it at: Razzles

    ?                                                  ?
    ? This Week's BRAIN TEASER and MOVIE QUOTE Answers ?
    ?                                                  ?


We fit inside every book or two, 
No telling what we do. 

We may change lives forever, 
We are clever, 

Or maybe just weak wit, 
We even make up the ingredients to a banana split! 

What are we?


MOVIE QUOTE: "As Wichita falls... so falls Wichita Falls." 


John Cusack as Charlie Arglist in "The Ice Harvest"

           GopherCentral's Question of the Week 

Do you support the Israeli military invasion of Lebanon?

 Please share your opinion, visit: The Question of the Week

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