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Publication: Clean Laffs
The kitchen luge.

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             CLEAN LAFFS - Friday, May 30, 2008

Good morning crew, 

What do you know? Maintenance on the air conditioner only 
cost 160 bucks. It's a heck of a lot better than a thousand 
bucks for a new one. 

The important part is that my apartment is now like a meat 
locker. I actually have to put food in the refrigerator 
to keep it from freezing. I'm thinking about flooding the 
living room and making a little ice rink. If I do the 
kitchen and the hallway, too, I might be able to build a 

How cool would that be?

Laugh it up, 


P.S. If you're interested we now have a Forum. You can post 
comments on this and recent issues at... Clean Laffs Forum


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I prefer to describe myself as a "Contemporary Anthropological 
Interactive Observer" because it has just the right amount 
of flair. Besides...."stalker" is such an ugly word. 


A lot of people wonder how you know if you're really in love. 
Just ask yourself this one question: "Would I mind being 
destroyed financially by this person?" 


While walking through a parking lot, I tripped and fell flat 
on my face. As I was lying there, a woman stopped her car 
and called out, "Are you hurt?" "No, I'm fine," I said, 
touched by her concern. "Oh, good," she continued. "So will 
you be vacating your parking space now?" 

Bring your damaged media discs back to life...

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Plain and simple you will love this item. It will save
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The Disc Repair System cleans surface scratches on CD's, 
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prevents audio discs from skipping. Plus, you can save 
vital data from damaged discs. This hand-powered carousel 
cleans and polishes discs without any batteries. Plus
you can get this system for less than cost. Want to save
even more? Grab two systems for $8.98. Visit: 


Bill's wife started noticing how forgetful he was becoming. 
Being the concerned wife, she convinced him to see a doctor.

Bill was a little worried when the doctor came in. Sensing 
his patient's nervousness, the first thing the doctor did 
was to ask what was troubling him.

"Well," Bill answered. "I seem to be getting forgetful. I'm 
never sure I can remember where I put the car, or whether 
I answered a letter, or where I'm going, or what it is I'm 
going to do once I get there, if I get there. So, I really 
need your help. What can I do?"

The doctor thought for a moment then answered, "Pay me in 

*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*

The fragrance department of a major New York City store where 
I shop is always pushing the latest scents. Attractive models 
move about the floor offering to spray customers with the 
newest bouquet. 

One day, outside the store's restaurant, a model sprayed two 
women who had just finished their lunch. When one woman com-
mented that the perfume was too strong, the model replied, 
"The fragrance will be softer once it dries and the alcohol 
wears off." 

"See!" her friend chided. "I told you not to have that second 


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