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Publication: Clean Laffs
Down with the Quartering Act and the Stamp Act!

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            CLEAN LAFFS - Thursday, July 3, 2008
-----------------------------------------------------------


Good morning crew, 

As you know tomorrow is Independence Day and that means we 
are going to be taking the day off and won't be mailing any 
newsletters. So if you were actually planning on sitting 
inside on your computer tomorrow and reading your email you 
really need to get out and find a barbecue to go to. 

I will be doing the same thing I do with my family every 
year. There will be a big party at Cousin Kaz's house during 
which we will burn an effigy of King George. It's a lot of 
fun. 

Then on Sunday I have a wedding to attend. It's going to be 
a busy weekend. 

Look for me again next week and I'll fill you in on all of 
the details. 

Laugh it up, 

Joe 

P.S. If you're interested we now have a Forum. You can post 
comments on this and recent issues at... Clean Laffs Forum

                            ***

HOME SECURITY DOOR ALARM

Store Price: $19.99 
DEAL PRICE: $9.99 or get two for $15.98

When you see this you'll wonder... how the heck does this work?
It's a door alarm that ANYONE can install... without any special 
wiring, on any non-metallic door. 

This handy device will sound an instant ear piercing alarm if 
anyone touches your door knob. The 2-in-1 Alarm is great 
protection against unwanted visitors. 

Best of all, besides the price, is No Wiring Needed!

And if you're like me and wonder how it does work, visit the
site and click on the link to watch the short video. Grab one
or save even more and get two. Visit: 

2 in 1 Home Security Door Alarm

                            ***

"It's the last weekend in California to drive and talk on 
the cell phone without a headset. Starting Tuesday, if you 
are caught talking on the phone without a hands-free device, 
you get hit with a $20 fine. One nice thing — now that I 
will have my hands free, it's easier to return gun fire with 
other motorists." -Jimmy Kimmel

                            ***

"My mother was as religious as she was repressed. Her facts 
of life speech began with the phrase, 'Satan takes many 
forms...'" -Dana Gould 

                            *** 

"They say that kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray, 
which is a good thing to remember the next time you get 
lonely." -Fred Stoller 


------------------------------------------------------------
CD PORTFOLIO (24 Capacity)

Normal Price: $7.99 
DEAL PRICE: $2.99

Carry your CDs with you wherever you go with this case that 
can hold either CDs or CD ROMS and holds up to 24 CDs. The 
stylish case not only protects your favorite CDs but it 
looks great, too!. 

This lightweight case features rugged nylon construction and 
an efficient design that zips all around. Also includes easy 
carrying handle. 

Grab one or two while you can. This is a closeout item so once 
they are gone, they are gone... CD PORTFOLIO (24 Capacity)
------------------------------------------------------------


A few years ago we were desperately trying to sell our house, 
which was situated on a busy thoroughfare. Our real estate 
agent decided to have open-house inspection nearly every day 
to promote the sale. We instructed the children not to talk 
to anyone about the house. 

One evening a man took our seven-year-old daughter aside and 
asked if our house had any secrets he should know. Her first 
reaction was to smile and ignore his question. But he became 
more persistent and, finally, she confessed there was one 
secret but she could not tell it to him. 

"Now we're getting somewhere," he said. "Tell me the secret. 
I promise I won't tell anyone." 

She looked him straight in the eye and whispered, "We have 
monsters in our sewer." 


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*

In the office where I work, there is a constant battle 
between our technical-support director and customer-service 
personnel over the room temperature, which is usually too 
low. 

The frustrated director, trying to get us to understand his 
position, announced one afternoon, "We need to keep the 
temperature below seventy-five degrees or the computers 
will overheat." 

Thinking that this was just another excuse, one of my 
shivering colleagues retorted, "Yeah right. So how did they 
keep the computers from overheating before there was air 
conditioning?" 

____________________________________________________________


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************************************************************
END OF CLEAN LAFFS  
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved. 

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