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Publication: Clean Laffs
Don't you wish you lived my life?

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           CLEAN LAFFS - Wednesday, July 16, 2008
-----------------------------------------------------------


Good morning crew, 

Payday yesterday! Although all I did last night was go to 
the gym and then go home so I didn't have any time to spend 
any of my loot, but tonight I may splurge and hit KFC. 

Don't you wish you lived the exciting life of a bachelor? 

Laugh it up, 

Joe 

P.S. If you're interested we now have a Forum. You can post 
comments on this and recent issues at... Clean Laffs Forum

                            ***

THE FOOT BUDDY... 
Like the Ped Egg, but 1/2 the Price

Retail Price: $9.99
OUR PRICE: $4.99

By now we've all seen the tv commercial countless time on the
Ped Egg. We were lucky to find The Foot Buddy which is the same
thing, made by the same factory... but at 1/2 the price.

Gently removes callous and dry skin. for smooth and beautiful 
feet. So gentle, it will not even burst a balloon. Safe to the 
touch and easy, no mess disposal.

- Comfortable ergonomic design 
- Over 135 stainless steel micro files 
- No mess- collects shavings 
- Safe to the touch 
- Includes 2 emery finishing pads 

At these affordable prices you can pick up a few. 

THE FOOT BUDDY... 

                            ***

"Listen to this, among the catering guidelines for the green 
convention, this is true, there will be no fried foods at 
the Democratic convention. And today, Al Gore announced he's 
switching his support to John McCain. He said 'That's it, 
you're a bunch of global warming fanatics!'" --Jay Leno

                            ***

"I was reading about this self help book, 'The Secret,' 
written by an Australian reality producer. One fan of the 
book said it stopped her panic attacks and doubled her 
acupuncture business. I'm thinking, 'Who's going to go see 
a panicky acupuncturist?'" -Craig Ferguson

                            ***

"Today's New York Times once again raised the issue that 
John McCain may not be eligible to be president because 
he's not a natural born U.S. citizen. Apparently, McCain 
was born outside the 13 colonies." -Conan O'Brien


------------------------------------------------------------
JUMBO POP-UP HAMPER

Normal Price: $4.99
DEAL PRICE: $1.99

Okay, I LOVE these. And I use them for just about everything.
With the warm weather coming, they are great for outdoors.
I love to put all the pool toys in them. It allows for them
to dry after being in the pool and it keeps them all together.

Get a few of them. You can use them for so many things. Ideal 
for college students, holding toys, and all the laundry you 
can fit. The best part is the nylon construction that makes 
this light as a feather.

It folds down to 6" and pops up to hold TWO (2) FULL LOADS
of LAUNDRY. 

Store it in the closet or in the corner of the room. We
guarantee this will help keep the kids' rooms tidy. This is
one of the best products we have ever carried and the
lightest hamper you will ever carry. 
 
Get A Great Hamper for Just $1.99
------------------------------------------------------------


When we put our house up for sale, I stressed emphatically 
that my sons make their beds each morning. 

I left for work before they left for school, and I wanted 
to be sure that the house looked presentable when the agent 
showed it to prospective buyers. 

I was surprised and impressed that my 15-year-old son's bed 
was perfectly made each day. Until that is, one night when 
I went into his room, I discovered his secret... 

He was fast asleep on the floor in his sleeping bag! 


*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*

A guy comes walking into a bar with a turtle in his hand. 

The turtle's one eye is black and blue, two of his legs are 
bandaged, and his whole shell is taped together with duct 
tape. 

The bartender looks at the guy and asks: "What's wrong with 
your turtle?" 

"Not a thing," the man responds, this beat up turtle is faster 
than your dog!" 

"Not a chance!" replies the barkeep. 

"Okay then, says the guy... you take your dog and let him stand 
at one end of the bar. Then go and stand at the other end of 
the room and call your dog. I'll bet you $500 that before your 
dog reaches you, my turtle will be there." 

So the bartender, thinking it's an easy $500, agrees. The 
bartender goes to the other side of the bar, and on the count 
of three calls his dog. 

Suddenly the guy picks up his turtle and throws it across the 
room, narrowly missing the bartender, and smashing into the 
wall and says - "I win!" 


____________________________________________________________


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END OF CLEAN LAFFS  
Copyright 2008 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved. 

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