Publication: Laff A Day Where was this Star Trek stuff 15 years ago? | |
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LAFF A DAY Thursday, July 24, 2008
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Greetings Laff Lovers,
I remember back in the nineties when they first came out with
vision correction surgery. Back then it was radial keratotomy.
They actually made incisions in your cornea with a diamond
knife in order to reshape the surface of the eye.
It sounds like medieval torture, doesn't it?
My eyes have always been a little off, but never bad enough
to warrant somebody slicing up my eyeballs with a knife.
Nowadays they have a whole new procedure that's done with
computers and lasers. It's called LASIK.
An instrument called a microkeratome is used to create a
thin, circular flap in the cornea. The surgeon folds the
flap back out of the way, then removes some corneal tissue
underneath using an ultraviolet laser in order to reshape
the cornea so it focuses light correctly.
I wish they had this Star Trek shit fifteen years ago when I
was first looking into eye surgery.
If you are interested in learning any more about the LASIK
procedure click the link to ALL ABOUT VISION below.
They have all the information you could ever want to know.
If you are a good candidate you could have near perfect
vision before you know it! You never know unless you click.
Visit: All About Vision
Clearly,
TZ
"Barack Obama was in Israel today. Did you see he was
wearing that traditional Jewish yarmulke? He looked very
Jewish. In fact, Jesse Jackson said, 'I'd like to circum-
cise him.'" -Jay Leno
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The ambitious coach of a girls track team gives the squad
steroids to help them out a bit. The team's performance
soars. They win the county and state championships and are
favored to win the national competition easily.
Penelope, a sixteen year old hurdler visits her coach and
says, "Coach, I have a problem. I'm starting to grow hair
where I never had it before."
"What?" the coach says in a panic, "Where are you growing
hair?"
She replies, "On my balls."
"Osama bin Laden's driver is on trial. Maybe you've seen
him at airports holding up a sign that says, 'Fanatical
Wackjob.'" -David Letterman
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Each morning Jake would drive down Sunset Blvd. on his way
to work. For the past year a pretty hooker standing on the
corner of Sunset gave him the eye as he passed. Of late, she
took to showing him parts of what he would get if he stopped
to pick her up. Jake was a good husband and family man and
didn't want to cheat on his wife. However, lately the hooker
was looking so tempting, he could not get her out of his mind.
After spending many sleepless nights, he went to consult a
psychiatrist. He told the psychiatrist she was driving him
crazy, he was married 25 years, and did not want to cheat on
his wife.
"What should I do?" asked Jake.
The psychiatrist said, "Take Melrose Avenue."
P.S. You can discuss this issue or any other topic in the
new Laffaday forum. Check it out here... Laffaday Forum
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*** THE WORLD ACCORDING TO TZ ***
It's Available. The Laffaday Book... Check it out, it's
F-R-E-E (you pay s&h). For more info or to order visit:
Laffaday Book
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More FUN and AMUSEMENT sent by email: www.gophercentral.com
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END OF LAFF A DAY
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