Publication: Gopher Bits "Mercy is for the weak!" | |
Subscribe FREE to Gopher Bits by clicking here.
GOPHER BITS - Friday, March 9, 2007
Over 4,000,000 readers subscribe to our F-R-E-E newsletters
for NEWS, FACTS, TRIVIA, HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT! To browse our
entire selection visit: http://www.gophercentral.com
------------------------------------------------------------
Greetings,
Those of you who are fans of our video page, www.EVTV1.com,
will be pleased to hear that we have recently upgraded to
a new, bigger video player. No more squinting to see if the
little blobs on color bouncing around on the screen are
actually people. The new player practically fills a quarter
of the screen!
And we have some fun new clips this week for you to check
the new player out on. As always the top five are right
below the opening comments, here, but if you scroll down
to the bottom of the page there is a link to a cool inter-
view with the guy who played Sensei Kreese in the old
'Karate Kid' movies. I used to love those flicks, and I
still think they're pretty cool.
Check it out!
Campbell
campbell@gophercentral.com
=======================================================
??????????????????????????????????????????????????
? ?
? This Week's Top Viewed Videos on EVTV1.com ?
? ?
??????????????????????????????????????????????????
TOP FIVE (5) VIEWED FOR THE WEEK:
1. Antonella Barba Video
2. Cat Plays Piano
3. When Britney Attacks
4. Race Car Hits Seagull at 180 MPH
5. Stupid People - Bad Ideas
** For more of the newest video every week, click for a **
F-R-E-E SUBSCRIPTION!
Subscribe to EVTV1
------------------------------------------------------------
--- American Idol - Unauthorized and Uncensored ---
Step backstage and get a first-hand glimpse of the nail-
biting audition process, the sold-out concerts and the
price that an 'idol' might pay for fame, fortune and even
disaster. This is a behind-the-scenes, no holds barred look
at the cultural phenomenon known as American Idol. If you
are one of the fans of this popular show, you won’t want to
miss this revealing expose - unauthorized - uncensored and
undeniably a collectible DVD!
You’ll even discover what life is like for idols after the
glow of American fame fades? Included in the DVD are:
Kelly Clarkson, Ruben, Fantasia, Bo, Paula Abdul, Simon
Cowell, Randy Jackson and more! Plus you'll save $5.00
off the normal retail price. Get this for just $14.99
American Idol - Unauthorized and Uncensored
------------------------------------------------------------
********************* CELEBRITY NOOZ *********************
Jersey Town Whacks Sopranos...
Looks like HBO can fugettabout bringing 'The Sopranos' to
one suburban New Jersey town. The city of Bloomfield has
barred the Emmy-winning series from filming an upcoming
episode there due to its "negative depictions of Italian-
Americans," Mayor Raymond McCarthy, whose wife happens to
be Italian said no to filming permits.
The series was slated to shoot its swan-song episode at a
local ice cream parlor. Upon hearing about it, however, the
mayor spearheaded a successful effort to whack the plans.
Both HBO and the owners of the Holsten's Brookdale Confect-
ionery are hoping to overturn the decision.
Other business owners are also unhappy with the mayor's
decision as the filming would throw a lot of money into
the town.
Subscribe to Celebrity Nooz
*************** BIZARRE STORY OF THE WEEK ****************
-------- Sword fight breaks out after break in ----------
BEAUFORT, S.C. - The Sheriff's Office of Beaufort County,
S.C., said a man who broke into his ex-girlfriend's home
was foiled by her roommate who sword-fought the invader.
Deputies said Elvis Javier Polanco brandished a 3-foot
sword when he broke into the home of his ex-girlfriend
last week, only to find that her roommate, Louis Delgado
Hernandez, was an avid sword collector and skilled in the
use of the weapons, the Hilton Head (S.C.) Island Packet
reports. Hernandez was able to disarm Polanco, cutting the
alleged invader's arm in the process. Polanco was treated
at the Hilton Head Regional Medical Center before being
taken to the Beaufort County Detention Center. Polanco was
charged with second-degree burglary and high-and-aggravated
assault and battery. Deputies said Hernandez will not face
charges. A second man accused of assisting Polanco with
breaking into the house is still being sought.
Subscribe to Bizarre News
Get Out & Walk... You'll Be Glad You Did!
One of the easiest and best forms of exercise is walking.
But did you know there are certain things to do when
walking that will help you achieve better health?
Let Leslie Sansone's revolutionary DVD convert the space
in front of your television into a fat burning, body
shaping, health improvement walking track.
The "Older Adults Walk & Firm" DVD is even more effective
than an outdoor or treadmill walk. You'll perform a
combination of simple walking based steps and proven
firming exercises, that will keep your muscles strong,
boost your metabolism and increase your energy. And
we've discounted the price to get you started. Pick-up
this DVD for just $9.99. Get more info or order at:
Older Adults Walk & Firm DVD
********************* WEEKLY JOKES **********************
LAFF A DAY:
A Greek and Italian were sitting in a Starbuck's one day
discussing who had the superior culture. Over triple lattes
the Greek guy says, "Well, we have the Parthenon."
Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the
Coliseum."
The Greek retorts, "We Greeks gave birth to advanced
mathematics."
The Italian, nodding agreement, says, "But we built the
Roman Empire."
And so on and so on until the Greek comes up with what he
thinks will end the discussion.
With a flourish of finality he says, "We invented sex!"
The Italian replies, "That is true, but it was the Italians
who introduced it to women!"
(WARNING! Contains adult humor and language)
Subscribe to Laff A Day
CLEAN LAFFS:
"That was nice of you to set up a blind date for your ex-
boyfriend."
"I know, but I don't hold any grudges."
"I'm surprised he trusted you enough to agree to go out
with her."
"Well, I had to swear to him she's Jennifer Lopez's double."
"Wow! Is that true?"
"I wouldn't lie. She's twice her weight and twice her age."
Subscribe to CLEAN LAFFS
------------------------------------------------------------
BRIEFCASE/LAPTOP BAG
Normal Price: $19.99
DEAL PRICE: $5.99
Plain and simple this is one heck of a deal. Discounted
below cost, you'll want to pick up a couple. Makes a great
gift. Check it out by visiting: Briefcase/Laptop Bag
------------------------------------------------------------
******************** WEEKLY VIDEO CLIP *********************
Casting Kresse in the Karate Kid
Martin Kove plays John Kreese Cobra Kai Sensei in this family
favorite Karate Kid shares his home movies of him getting
prepared for his audition.
View it at: Casting Kresse in the Karate Kid
More great videos for every interest at: www.evtv1.com
????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? ?
? We've got an offer you can't refuse ?
? ?
????????????????????????????????????????????????????
We're featuring today's deal item so you can have it just in
time for April Fool's Day. In reality it's pretty fun anytime.
If you love pranks, check it out... and it's reduced to $1.29.
THE SHOCKING HAND BUZZER
Order Yours For A Fun April Fool's Day...
Store Price: $5.99
OUR PRICE: $1.29
This is a fun novelty item that is an update to the classic
hand buzzer prank. With this one, instead of a buzz to the
hand, your unsuspecting mark will get a ZAAAP.
This item is carefully disguised to be slipped to the unwary
target. They get a harmless but alarming jolt. Always good for
a jump and a shout.
Take our advice and do not use this gag while trying to pick
up girls. We are not responsible for slaps. Pranker's Paradise
ranks this **** 1/2 (four and a half stars out of five).
Today's Deal of the Day
Click here and look for DEAL OF THE DAY at the top of the page.
------------------------------------------------------------
GopherCentral's Question of the Week
Will President Bush be a valuable asset to Republicans in
the 2008 elections?
Please share your opinion, visit: The Question of the Week
------------------------------------------------------------
To see more issues like this visit: Gopher Bits Archives
More Free Fun and Amusement by email: www.gophercentral.com
------------------------------------------------------------
END OF GOPHER BITS - Another FREE Gopher Central publication
http://www.gophercentral.com
Copyright 2007 by NextEra Media. All rights reserved.
E-Mail this issue
Subscribe FREE to Gopher Bits by clicking here.
|