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GOPHER BITS - Friday, May 5, 2006
Over 4,000,000 readers subscribe to our F-R-E-E newsletters
for NEWS, FACTS, TRIVIA, HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT! To browse our
entire selection visit: http://www.gophercentral.com
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Comment The Post Below...
Greetings,
Some of the boys are heading over to Murphy's this afternoon
to celebrate Cinco de Mayo. And if anyone knows how to get
into the spirit of a Mexican holiday it's an Irish pub. It
would take a stronger man than me to turn his back on five
dollar pitchers of watery margaritas and free year-old bar
pretzels. All I have to do is figure out how to convince
my wife that she's better off at home with the kids. I have
about four hours to come up with an idea. Anybody have any
suggestions?
Campbell
campbell@gophercentral.com
P.S. If you're interested we now have a blog. You can post
comments on this and recent issues at... Gopher Bits Blog
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??????????????????????????????????????????????????
? ?
? Guess This Week's BRAIN TEASER and MOVIE QUOTE ?
? ?
??????????????????????????????????????????????????
TEASE:
Find a common 12 letter english word containing three P's,
two R's, two A's, one O, one E, one D, one T, and one other
vowel.
MOVIE QUOTE:
"You know, you don't act like a scientist. You're more like
a game show host."
*** Answers at the bottom! ***
** For more Teasers and Movie Quotes, click below for a **
F-R-E-E SUBSCRIPTION!
The Daily Tease
Subscribe to The Daily Tease
Squirrely's Film Quotes and TV Trivia
Subscribe to Film Quotes
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******************* CELEBRITY NOOZ *******************
Sopranos Stars Arrested...
Two actors from 'The Sopranos' have been arrested on un-
related charges. John Ventimiglia, who plays chef Artie
Bucco, was arrested on Monday on suspicion of drunk driving
and possessing cocaine.
John was pulled over after the car he was driving swerved
without its headlights on. The arresting officer said the
actor smelled of alcohol and his speech was slurred.
Subsequent tests found a blood alcohol level of 0.12 per
cent and Ventimiglia was allegedly carrying a small plastic
bag containing the residue of a white powder believed to be
cocaine.
John protested his innocence and has been released while a
court date is set. His lawyer said in a statement: "John
feels terrible and embarrassed. Until we gather all the
information we will have no further comment."
Meanwhile Louis Gross, who portrays bodyguard Perry
Annunziata, was arrested on Sunday for allegedly breaking
into a New York City property.
Louis was released on Monday without bail. He told reporters,
"I don't know nothing. I'm innocent. I'm always innocent."
Subscribe to Celebrity Nooz
************** BIZARRE STORY OF THE WEEK ***************
-------- Massage Parlor Rubs Client The Wrong Way ----------
LONDON - About $7,000 worth of damage was done to the lobby
of a massage parlor by a client who was unhappy. David
Albert, 41, admitted he trashed the front entrance of the
Mirage Exotic Massage because he thought money had been
taken from his clothing. After Albert had received a massage
on March 1, he went storming into the front lobby screaming
and yelling. He destroyed a front desk, the phones, a heater,
a lamppost and various other objects. "I didn't realize
massage was supposed to have that effect," said Ontario
Court Justice John Getliffe after hearing what happened.
Albert's lawyer, George Grant, said his client thought $140
had been stolen from him.
Subscribe to Bizarre News
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******************* WEEKLY JOKES ********************
LAFF A DAY:
A woman pregnant with her first child paid a visit to her
obstetrician's office. After the exam, she shyly said, "My
husband wants me to ask you..."
The doctor cut her off and reassured her, "I know, I know,
I get the same question all the time. Sex is fine until late
in the pregnancy."
"No, that's not it," the woman confessed. "He wants to know
if I can still mow the lawn."
(WARNING! Contains adult humor and language)
Subscribe to Laff A Day
CLEAN LAFFS:
My mom has a lead foot, so I was not surprised when a state
trooper pulled us over as we were driving through Georgia.
Hoping to get off with a warning, Mom tried to appear shocked
when he walked up to the car.
"I have never been stopped like this before," she said to the
officer.
"What do they usually do, ma'am," he asked, "shoot the tires
out?"
Subscribe to CLEAN LAFFS
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How Smart Are You?
If you're like me, you always wondered what the heck your
I.Q. is and what an I.Q. test is all about.
Well, now you can find out. And the best part you can do
it online, now, for free. You'll get the results right away,
too. Have some fun and hopefully you will get to brag :)
VISIT: How Smart Are You
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****************** WEEKL VIDEO CLIP *******************
My Name Is Earl - #86: Stolen Car
Jason Lee stars as Earl Hickey in the Fox comedy sitcom
'My Name Is Earl'. Watch as Earl gets beat up from a double
amputee because Earl stole his one-legged girlfriends car.
View it at: My Name Is Earl
????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? ?
? This Week's BRAIN TEASER and MOVIE QUOTE Answers ?
? ?
????????????????????????????????????????????????????
TEASE:
Find a common 12 letter english word containing three P's,
two R's, two A's, one O, one E, one D, one T, and one other
vowel.
TEASE ANSWER: APPROPRIATED
MOVIE QUOTE:
"You know, you don't act like a scientist. You're more like
a game show host."
MOVIE QUOTE ANSWER:
Sigourney Weaver as Dana Barrett in "Ghostbusters"
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GopherCentral's Question of the Week
Do you support the "immigration protest of May 1st"?
Please share your opinion, visit: The Question of the Week
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More Free Fun & Amusement by email: www.gophercentral.com
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