Publication: Dear Abby
Delivering Bad News Is Hard For Some Employers To Handle | |
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DEAR ABBY - December 1, 2006
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DELIVERING BAD NEWS IS HARD FOR SOME EMPLOYERS TO HANDLE
ABBY: What has happened to professional courtesy in the
workplace? I am a high school teacher, and recently a
colleague learned that he was being replaced by another
teacher when he read it in the school board minutes! The
principal did not even extend the courtesy of telling him
in person -- although his room and her office are only yards
apart. Abby, that teacher could have been applying for other
jobs.
Another example: My daughter works in the television industry
and is quite successful. Months ago, she was contacted by a
major network asking if she was interested in applying for
an opening with them. They interviewed her twice, then flew
her cross-country at their expense for a final interview, at
which time she was told she would hear from them the following
week. That was two months ago. Is it that difficult for a
prospective employer to call and say, "We offered the position
to someone else," or "We haven't decided yet"?
Finally, my son, a college student, was told he would hear in
one week when he was to start a new job. That was five weeks
ago. Couldn't the employer have been honest up front and told
him that perhaps they wouldn't need him right then? My son
could have accepted another job and have been earning money
instead of waiting.
Employers: Prospective employees have lives and obligations.
Put yourselves in their shoes. How would you like to put your
life on hold while someone dangles a carrot in front of you?
Please show some professional courtesy!
-- DISAPPOINTED IN NEWPORT, PA.
DISAPPOINTED: Sometimes people have an aversion to giving
others bad news, so they say nothing, figuring the message
will get out -- eventually. Obviously, the principal wimped
out rather than face the teacher and tell him his contract
would not be renewed.
As for your daughter's experience, "show biz" is notorious
for its lack of empathy -- and even honesty -- when it comes
to telling someone things aren't working out. I hope she
lands a higher-paying job at another network.
Your son's experience this summer could provide a valuable
lesson for him. In the future, if someone tells him he'll
get word in seven days and it doesn't happen, he should
resume his job search on day No. 8. Period.
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ABBY: I am 11 years old and I have a problem. When I call
some of my "friends," they don't return my calls. But the
thing is, they said they'd return my calls. Well, guess what
-- they haven't!
The only friend I feel I actually have is my boyfriend, but
I need a friend who's a girl. My mom and dad say, "Wait for
them to come to you," but I have been doing it for five
years. I have a little brother, but he's annoying! I feel
lonely, but also like a "nudge." What should I do?
-- LONELY AND BAMBOOZLED IN S. CAROLINA
LONELY: I'm sure that, at one time or another, everyone has
promised to call someone and it has slipped his or her mind.
However, when it happens consistently, then the promise-
breakers are sending a message -- and the message is they
are not "friends."
Five years is more than enough time to "wait" for people
to respond to offers of friendship. Please tell your parents
that the time has come to help you get involved in activities
outside this circle of acquaintances -- possibly
extracurricular activities and/or religious-based youth
activities so you can meet girls who will be more inclusive.
Boyfriends may be great, but girlfriends usually last longer.
ABBY is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as
Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline
Phillips. Write ABBY at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box
69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
____________________________________________________________
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END OF ABBY
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