Publication: Clean Laffs
The root of all evil. | |
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CLEAN LAFFS - Friday, March 14, 2008
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Good morning crew,
Somebody just got their tax return today. Today just also
happens to be payday for somebody.
I guess somebody has to decide whether to pay bills and put
some money into the bank or to go to the casino boat.
It's too bad somebody has impulse spending control problems.
Laugh it up,
Joe
P.S. If you're interested we now have a Forum. You can post
comments on this and recent issues at... Clean Laffs Forum
***
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***
"This is my brother's Ritalin. Ritalin's good for studying
math or science, just don't try to write English papers on
it or it won't make any sense. Enjoy that."
--Dave Ruby as Zeke in "Dead Man on Campus".
***
"Am I going mad or did the word THINK escape your lips!"
--Wallace Shawn as Vizzini in The Princess Bride.
***
"In the school I went to, they asked a kid to prove the law
of gravity and he threw the teacher out of the window."
--Rodney Dangerfield in Back to School.
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My wife cannot ride in a car without telling whoever is
driving what to do, when to do it, etc. She is, bar none,
the worst back seat driver in the world. I have long
thought this, though she would deny it. She claimed she
seldom, if ever made comments about my driving. I, of
course, claimed the opposite. Now I have proof.
The other day we were headed for the mall and my daughter
piped up, "Daddy, before you married Mommy, who told you
how to drive?"
*-------------- Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ---------------*
On vacation, a man and his wife check into a hotel. The
husband wants to have a snack at the restaurant, but his
wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to
their room to rest.
She lies down on the bed... just then, a train passes by
very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's
thrown out of the bed.
Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down
once more. But just a few minutes later a train again
shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor.
Exasperated, she calls the front desk and asks for the
manager who says he'll be right up.
The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story
is true.
"Look... lie here on the bed -- you'll be thrown right to
the floor!" So he lies down next to the wife.
Just then the husband walks in. He takes one look at the
manager lying in bed with his wife and yells, "Hey! What
are you doing in here!?"
The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I'm waiting
for a train?"
____________________________________________________________
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END OF CLEAN LAFFS
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